HOW TO HANDLE CHANGE?
Ever had to relocate to another Town or country? Switched schools? Gotten a new job? If yes, I am sure that getting used to the new place or job, was not exactly easy.
Fear, according to H.P. Lovecraft, is the oldest and strongest kind of emotion, he also went on to identify that the fear of the unknown, is the oldest and strongest form of fear. The biggest aspect of fear, is having to adapt to these changes that are coming.
What do I mean by change?
Change as a word and concept has various definitions, but one thing that is common in all these definitions and conceptualization is the occurrence and use of the word, ‘different’. We would all agree that with whatever personal idea we might have on change, it always has to do with something that is going to make a difference, a difference in our lives, routines, workplace, psychology and sometimes, health.
Before I continue, I would like to give a definition of change, using the third definition out of ten definitions that have been given in the Advanced English Dictionary. ‘Change is simply to become different in some particular way, without permanently losing one’s or it’s former characteristics or essence.’ Some other definitions would say that change leads to a total transformation of one’s characteristics or essence, but as you go further with this article, you would understand why I have chosen to stick with this particular Advanced English Dictionary’s definition of change.
In the reality in which we exist, the only constant thing that seems to be is change. So there is no way you can avoid change. Most times these changes have to do with our bodies and biological makeup. Whereby it could be the transition from childhood to teenage years and then becoming a youth up until adulthood.
There is also the transition from being an adult to being an elderly whereby your body takes you through the menopause phase. These changes can be very scary as we wonder how we can handle and live with these changes.
The changes could also be with our environment such as: a change in whether or climatic change, environmental hazards and it could just generally be a change of environment. We also experience a change in our places of work, these changes could be a personal promotion or demotion, a change in authority or immediate boss, it could be a total change of working environment or the big leap into a career switch. We can find change in our personal lives and homes, it could be the addition of a child, the growth of your children, the change in the attitude of your partner and so on.
In essence, we can find change in absolutely every aspect of our lives, so there is little need for you to try to run away from change even though some part of our psyche, craves for consistency or some sort of normalcy.
Here are some tips that would help you handle change a whole lot better;
1. Acknowledge the change
One of the first steps of dealing with change is to be able to identify and acknowledge the particular change that you are going through. Do not ignore the change going on with you as sometimes, we try to pretend like nothing is going on. You need to accept that ‘this’ or ‘that’ is changing if you are going to be able to handle those changes well.
2. Face your fears
One thing you should not do when going through change is to run away from your fears. You should be able to ask yourself questions like, why am I afraid of this particular incident? What is the worst that could come out of this change? Why do I think this particular change should or should not occur?
These questions, help you to identify the reasons you are afraid of the changes you are going through. In facing these fears, you can write down these reasons you have identified and go through them constantly, trying to devise a plan that would work for you. So next time you are going through a change, major or minor, make sure you don’t run from your fears, but face it squarely.
3. Seek help and support
Most times, these changes are much bigger than what our minds and emotions can take, do not be afraid to seek help and support from friends, relatives or therapist. Sometimes, the mare assurance of having support and help during periods of change, make these changes much easier for us to bare.
Still, some of us are usually ashamed or scared to seek help, other times we just do not see the need to disturb the people in our lives with what is going on with us, however, we need to remember the inter-connectedness of the human race and that most times you are not going through these changes alone, there are people out there who have experienced these changes and would be able to help you get through your own phase of change. You could always seek a therapist if you do not feel too comfortable relating these changes to your family and friends.
4. Keep an open and positive mind
You cannot go through change well if you keep having a closed mindset and all you see is the negative aspect of the change. You have to be open to the new possibilities these changes might bring and try to analyse them with a positive mindset.
Be flexible and be open to the new changes and tasks that come with it and try to be an active part of the change. Whenever the negative thoughts come to mind and you feel yourself begin to panic, calm down, take a deep breath and try to go over the positive things that could actually come out of this particular change.
With these tips, you would discover that you have a whole new attitude towards change rather than the usual panic, fear or disdain for change. When you get a grasp of the change occurring in your life, you would find out that you might just enjoy going through it!
Much Love
