HOW TO KNOW IF HE IS CHEATING ON YOU?
I had my very first heartbreak when I was seventeen and it was with my first love. He cheated. I had no idea that he was cheating up until the final moments when I caught him with a random girl. That was when I realized that all the signs I had been noticing and ignoring in the relationship all the while, were true.
The feeling of betrayal and being cheated on by a loved one, especially one whom you have envisioned spending the rest of your life with, is one of the most painful emotions that can be felt by anyone. Falling in love is one thing, but remaining in love with someone you trust to be faithful, is another.
However, there are times during the relationship that you begin to have the bugging feeling of infidelity from your partner. Most times, it might just be mere anxiety in the relationship, other times, these feelings might be true.
How are you able to tell if your partner is cheating?
The ability to tell if your partner is cheating differs in relationships. It depends on how well you think you know your partner. It also depends on the personality of your partner, as some cheating partners are more obvious from their behaviour patterns. However, there are general warning signs that should put you on alert as to the fidelity of your partner. These signs include;
Changes to the level of attention you get: Do you feel ignored by your boyfriend or partner? Has he not been paying attention to you the way he normally does? Does he seem distracted during conversations with you?
Most times, whenever guys cheat on their partners, they find it really hard to maintain the same level of attention that they had with their partner prior to the external affair. Therefore, it would be difficult for a cheating partner to give you as much attention as he should because he has someone else to share this attention with.
Also, he is easily distracted during conversations with you? A cheating partner’s mind tends to wander a lot, especially during conversations. Although, a man is likely to be going through work stress and still exhibit these signs, but in most cases, it is more likely that the reason for his sudden divided attention towards you is due to his infidelity. On the flip side, he could become over attentive, towards you – this may be because he feels guilty about what he has done and does not want you to find out, so he becomes extra cautious and showers you with more gifts than usual.
He becomes secretive: Your loving partner who is usually very open with you, all of a sudden becomes rigid. He no longer tells you things like he used to, he does not like to initiate conversations anymore or he becomes overprotective of his phone; these are definitely signs of a cheating partner.
When your partner does not share essential parts of his day with you anymore, he is probably cheating on you. Sometimes, a cheating partner becomes overprotective of his phone. You can notice this when he changes his password, never leaves you alone with his phone, leaves the room you’re in to answer a call or deletes most of his chats. This sudden change, can screams infidelity. Be alert girls!
Avoids you: Your partner who usually enjoys your company, suddenly stops wanting to hang out with you. He misses most of your calls and does not call back, even when you ask about it, he gives no definite reason as to why he could not pick your calls. He comes home really late when he is sure you have fallen asleep and avoids any form of confrontation or conversation with you. He gives excuses daily of being so busy that’s why he’s not been able to see you. When you begin to notice that he does not try half as much as he used to, especially when you have done nothing relatively wrong, your suspicions about the fidelity of your partner might just be true!
Finds Excuses: Does your partner suddenly have a host of excuses up his sleeves? Cheating alert! Sometimes, a cheating partner begins to give all sorts of excuses for everything. He has an excuse to give for a cancelled date, a missed call, those secret calls late at the night, a lipstick stain on his shirt. Excuses! Most times, these excuses are barely coherent and can barely add up. I can hear you ladies saying “but I love him”, sure you do, but how much do you love yourself?
Your gut tells you: Always trust your gut on issues like this. Most times, the feeling in our guts is simply the universe way of putting us on alert and drawing our attention to certain situations like a cheating partner. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes you could be wrong. You may have been through heartbreak in the past and still carry the scars, which have made you a little extra sensitive to certain things. But, in most cases, you are right. You may try to ignore this strong feeling simply because you do not want it to be true, however, you owe it to yourself to know the truth, learn to work with your gut in any relationship rather than totally ignore it, the truth may just be right there.
Sometimes, your partner could be giving these signs and not be cheating as he could be going through some personal crisis. Ladies you will have to have “that talk” to give you peace of mind. Let him know how you are feeling, and if there is any doubt then maybe its time to evaluate your relationship, is it worth your mind, your heart, ones dignity?
Come on Ladies you are worth more than that!
Much Love
